One Big Week

We saw lots of people this Thanksgiving:  both sets of parents, one brother, one sister-in-law, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and a wad of little second cousins. 

Thanksgiving lasted about a week for us between having family visit and traveling back to eastern IA to see more family.

Just a few pictures from our big Thanksgiving week.

 Early Christmas gifts from Andy and Tekla

Family: Ben and Emma with Ben's brother Andy, mom Sharon, grandparents Merlin & LaVerna 

(that's 4 generations in 1 picture!)

Emma's first swim--a good time was had by all

Emma with Uncle Andy and Aunt Tekla

Turning 6 months!

On to Christmas!!

October 24th

October 24th was a good day. First of all, my dad turned 63 (whoa)! Happy birthday, Dad!!

 Emma hit 5 months yesterday, too. 

We also attempted cereal for the first time.

I would say it was a success!

She tried really hard to crawl but didn't get anywhere. But she gets an A for effort. And 5 months also marked her biggest blowout yet. It was a 10 of out 10. I did take a picture but I'll spare you. :)

Fortunately for my sanity, I do get a little time here and there to do the things I like to do. Like wasting time on Pinterest. I enjoy spending time looking at all the cool things I could make if I had the time. :)

But once in a while, I do get to make some of the things I see.....

Christmas/winter candle holders made using rubber bands and silver spray paint.

Snowy candle holder made with Modge Podge, epsom salt, and clear coat spray paint.

No-sew bed skirt.

Thanks for reading!!

4 Months and My Receding Hairline

Awww. Isn't she cute. :) 

I should also capture a picture of me after I've entertained her for 2 hours, get her down for a nap, and she's up and ready to go after a very short 45 minutes. I'm pretty tired this week.

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If you're expecting, whether it's for the first time or fourth time or you've recently given birth, 

this blog is for you. 

I feel like no one really prepares you for all the weird, gross, hormonal stuff that happens after baby comes along. Even the nurses at baby class were really nice about the stuff to expect afterward. Thank goodness I found this blog. I even had Ben read it. 

Maybe a little to gross for some of you but for me this was the honesty I needed. And if you don't/didn't experience all 10 of those fun 'post-baby phenomena,' you probably will or did experience a good number of them. 

Personally, I think I dealt with pretty much all of them. And right now, I'm losing my hair. 

I'm not talking about a few hairs here and there. I'm talking about brushfulls upon brushfulls. I'm talking about the hair trap looking like it's clogged with a small, furry animal after I wash my hair. I'm talking about not wanting to wear my hair in a ponytail because of my receding hairline.  

I am not even joking. My hairline looks exactly like this. How depressing. But what can I do? I guess I'll just try to make light of it and make sure I document it so I can show Emma what I went through to bring her into this world. HA! :)

Goodbye, summer. You were pretty great.

This morning the weather guy said that fall starts on Saturday--WHAT?? I mean, yeah, I'll admit I started decorating for fall as soon as September started. But summer's almost over? I don't understand where it went so quickly.

Oh right. That's what I did all summer! :)

Although the end of summer does bum me out, I LOOOOOOOVE FALL!!!!!!!

Happy Fall, Y'all! :)

Imperfection At Its Finest

This is me.

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Perfectionist

Worrywart

Competitive

Impatient

Control freak

Dislikes change

This is me with a baby.

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The transition from my finely tuned, orderly life to motherhood has not been a walk in the park for this high strung mamacita. 

Because, let's face it, babies are ALWAYS CHANGING! 

Every day is different and each new week is worlds apart from the previous one. Emma goes from being a napping, eating machine one week to catnapping, hardly eating, and a crabby patty the next. 

And all this makes me a little bit of a crazy pants!

Why does this make me so crazy?? 

Because I like to be in control. I like things to go MYYYYYYYYYY WAAAAAY!!! 

And just so you know......my way = perfect. :)

If things aren't going my way, I try to squish them into my mold of perfection. This doesn't work with a baby. So what happens is that I start to screw things up.

For example, Emma woke up 30 minutes early from her nap. So I went up, shushed and patted her and left the room. I did this several times. She started crying like I've never heard her cry before. And I just kinda sat on the couch because I was not getting her up early. It was still nap time and wasn't even close to feeding time. She was going to stay in bed!! 

Ben went up and got her up, brought her down (still screaming bloody murder) and started to feed her. She proceeded to eat all 7 oz of milk. Whooooops. Well, I screwed that up. I was so worried about her sticking to my schedule that I didn't even consider that she may be hungry. So much for perfection.

But I found comfort in this quote I found this morning:  

Motherhood is a choice you make every day, to put someone else's happiness

and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, 

to do the right thing even when you're not sure what the right thing is... 

and to forgive yourself, over and over again, 

for doing everything wrong. 

~ Donna Ball, At Home on Lady Bug Farm

Motherhood is imperfect. I will do things wrong. On an hourly basis. And I have to be okay with that. 

So, instead of trying so hard to be perfect, I'm going to start doing my best to be Emma's mom. :)

3 months old and a wedding!

Someone's 3 months old today! 

And we're pretty sure she's teething. But at least I got a good smile out of her.

In other news......my brother.............

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GOT MARRIED!!!!!!

At least Cassie makes up for his lack of normalcy. 

Who am I kidding? He's not the only one a little off kilter! :)

Missing Me

I will preface this post with the following: 

These are my honest feelings. You may not agree with them and I don't expect you to. But please don't try to make me feel guilty for feeling the way I do. 

And if you do, I with climb through my computer and mess you up! :)

Is identity loss a normal feeling after having kids? 

I think moms don't talk about this sort of thing for fear of looking like a bad parent. 

But I'm saying it:  I miss my old life. I miss ME! 

And I don't feel bad about that. I don't think I should feel bad about missing how things used to be.

I miss sleeping through the night. 

I miss going on motorcycle rides.

I miss getting to do my hair every day. (I really, really, REALLY miss this!!)

I miss going wherever I wanted whenever I felt like it.

I miss work....mainly because I was in charge and things generally went how I wanted. :)
I miss having free time!!! (I started this post early this afternoon and didn't get to finish it until tonight!)

And I really dislike being asked how I feel about being a mom. Because I know what they want to hear. 

"Oh, I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE it! It's so AMAZING!!!!" 

Please.

My response is more like, "It's hard but I like it for the most part." 

I'm sorry, you didn't like my answer? Then don't ask the question in the first place.

Look, none of this means that I wish I weren't a mom. See what a cutie she is??

But I'm allowed to miss parts of my life now that I have a baby.

And I don't have to feel bad about it. 

I feel better getting that out there. :)